Former Hare Turns Tortoise

It’s good to re-read parts of Turning the Mind into an Ally, and I’ve also just ordered (yeah for Kindles!) the Dalai Lama’s book, The Stages of Meditation. A little study helps me remember not just HOW to sit, but WHY.

Meditation is NOT passive. It isn’t taking time out from doing something – it IS doing something. I’m not sitting to take a breather, lower my blood pressure, slow my heart rate, de-stress or escape from pressing duties, although all of these things are possible with meditation. I’m sitting to train the mind. It’s an ACTIVE process of focused attention on the breath. It’s as much an activity as doing dishes, grading literature essays, or feeding peacocks. In fact, meditation reminds me to be more present, more attentive, more grateful during these other activities, as well.

Recently, my generous and kindhearted quasi-son-in-law and I had another conversation about Buddhism. He'd like to give me a little push beyond my daily practice, to share with me his enthusiasm for & deeper knowledge of Buddhism: the two kinds of meditation (concentration/insight), why it’s a good thing to promote Buddhism among friends, relatives, etc., the benefits/truth of Buddhism compared to other enduring world religions. I tensed up and resisted, unable to clearly explain to him why. And believe me, it’s a rare thing for me to be at a loss for words…

I guess the bottom line is this: It’s enough for me right now to actively practice peaceful abiding.

In my younger days, I would have been very impatient to learn it all, know it all, practice it all. I would have wanted to fast-track my way toward Enlightenment. I would have given away my stuff, shaved my head, packed up my Birkies, and set off to join a Buddhist community.

I’m older now, though, and finally learning to be patient. My goal for right now, as Turning the Mind suggests, is to easily set thoughts aside and keep my mind focused on the breath for an entire sitting. That's all. When I can do that, THEN I’ll be ready for the next step. Some days, it seems I have a looooong way to go. But that’s okay. I'm happy slowly plodding along. For now, learning to be completely present and gently, repeatedly (exhaustively sometimes) coaxing my mind to sit still is enough.